Cannabis Fun Club in Russia

Chapter #0: About who Mitya is

These stories are based on real events from the life of an absolutely real person named Mitya. Our hero is simply an amazing person: you can talk to him about absolutely any topic. Without much effort, he can support any conversation, no matter what the topic is. Moreover, the listeners stand and listen to him with their mouths open, and often do not even know what to answer him. Mitya easily becomes the life of any company and always comes up with something entertaining. And everything would be fine, if not for one problem. However, let's not be disingenuous, it is from this problem that all the positive aspects of Mitya come. The fact is that Mitya smokes. Or rather, that he smokes.

Chapter #1: About Mitya's friends

Mitya is a 10th-grader at the most lazy school in St. Petersburg. According to the students of this general education institution, "the only school worse than this is the school for idiots on Vasilievsky Island." During breaks, Mitya and his classmates smoke joints and apparently only go to school for that. There is a story about how he was caught with a joint, but the author of this epic, unfortunately, was never able to hear it to the end, that's just how fate worked out :-/
According to eyewitnesses who once came to visit Mitya, he and two of his friends were crawling along the corridor and playing "crocodile war", while three more were sitting and staring at the box with absolutely glassy eyes and an expression of deathly calm and surprise on their faces all rolled into one...

Chapter #2: About Mitya's love for studying

At some point in time, this stoner's school decided to take care of providing the children with textbooks, apparently preparing for an inspection by the district education department. They were collecting money for physics textbooks. With great difficulty, they somehow managed to collect it and shake out of these slackers some amount of money needed to buy a set. They decided to send someone more reliable to the Drofa publishing house to buy books. Whoever they asked, everyone refused. In general, everyone was sitting there, bored and unnoticed, when Mitya got a wonderful idea. He got up and declared: "I'm going!"
It is difficult to describe the surprise of his classmates and the physics teacher along with the head teacher when our hero uttered these courageous words. But it’s even harder to imagine their excitement when Mitya didn’t show up to school the next day. And the next one. And one more time later... He arrived only the next week, in, to put it mildly, unintelligible form. The fact is that Mitya simply smoked his physics textbooks. That is, he bought herbs, buns and pills and literally had a blast for the rest of the week...

Chapter #3: About Mitya's intelligence

Several years ago, when Mitya was just starting to get into soft drugs in heavy doses, the following story happened. It is worth noting that our hero is extremely lazy, which, when combined with his eternal stoned state, gives simply amazing results, affecting the character, actions, thoughts and, in general, the guy's whole life. Well, here it is. One day, Mitya received guests at his home. Mitya's house deserves a description in a separate story. It's just that all his things smell like the owner. That is, they smell of marijuana and coca. Even the plants look like ganjubas. And the cat! Mitya the cat is the complete embodiment of the owner in the animal world. An absolutely lazy, useless creature, too young to just die, but too old to be into cats. This one is so fat that it is easier for him to roll to his destination than to stand on his plump paws.
And here’s what happened: a stoned Mitya sat in the circle of his equally stoned friends and drank green tea. The gentlemen thought it was extremely interesting, unusual and fun - drinking something greenish-yellow. In another outburst, our stoned hero swept his half-empty cup onto the floor. The dishes themselves did not seem to be damaged, but a decent-sized puddle of green tea formed next to the cat, who was enjoying himself next to the kitchen table. Mitya was far from a fool. “Why should I go somewhere to get a rag?” - thought our hero. The idea came by itself after a certain period of time.
The guests' faces lengthened considerably when they saw Mitya wiping the floor with the cat. Moreover, the cat was lying quite quietly and the people, having recovered from smoking, wondered for a long time who of all those present, including the guests, the cat and Mitya himself, was more cold-blooded in this situation...

Chapter #4: About Mitya's observation skills

One day Mitya went with some other imbecile friends to relax in some park in the glorious city of St. Petersburg. They had a cultural vacation: a joint each, plus three traffic jams for the four of us. They sat and sat, and suddenly it started to rain. Well, okay, they decided to go home. The metro seemed to them not only the most fun, but also the fastest way to get around. With the jokes and gags of stoners, the whole quartet gets into the metro car and begins to slowly look around at the passengers to have a good laugh: they're going crazy! Then our observant hero Mitya saw something that made his eyes become even rounder, if that's even possible, and their owner nervously turned to his friends and declared to his comrades in a mysterious, broken half-whisper: "There's an ambush!!!"
All three of the hero's friends automatically turned their heads in the direction Mitya was pointing with his shaking hand and also went crazy. They went crazy, however, not for long, because about ten seconds later everyone was so overcome with laughter that the entire "ambush" began to look at them strangely. And our heroes, to be on the safe side, ran out at the next station with wild hooting, as if from a pack of dogs. Of course: it's not every day that you see a whole bench of police officers in full dress sitting in a row in the metro, who, as always, can't wait for a service car.
But still, Mitya is a good guy, an observant guy.

livejournal.com/users/aidan4/147013.html

05/20/2005
mrc
great about the metro :)

05/23/2005
Purity
Disco, write, what's the problem :)

08.07.2006
got high
yeah, shit, cool kid